#jegulus textpost

[redadidassneakers]

Pandora: does he make your heart beat really fast?

Regulus: I have anxiety, Dora, everything makes my heart beat really fast

[wolvesandshine]

James: I’m bisexual

Remus(who has caught James with Regulus multiple times): Wow who would have thought?

Peter (who had to tell James he was pining for Regulus): Right I definitely didn’t know what a surprise

Sirius(who had been living in denial): Fuck you Prongs you had one job

[rhetorical-conscience]

Regulus: That's ridiculous, Potter doesn't have a crush on me.

Dorcas: Yes he does.

Barty: Yes he does.

Pandora: Yes he does.

Evan: Yes he does.

Remus: Yes he does.

Lily: Yes he does.

Marlene: Yes he does.

Random portrait on the fourth floor: Yes he does.

James: Yes I do.

[dreamer0903]

Regulus: Hey, wanna take a shower with me?

James : I have a gun in that nightstand beside the bed. If I ever say no to that question, I want you to take it out and shot me because I’ve obviously gone crazy.

[accio-sriracha]

James: *staring lovingly at Regulus* I would literally die for you.

Regulus: *walking away, trying to hide his blush* Then fucking do it, Potter.

[d3adgayw1zzyr3ad3r]

Okay, but like;

Sirius: *running through the common room in a panic* RUN FOR YOUR LIVES.

Remus: *Angrily walking, 7 seconds behind him, in a steady stride* CHEATER.

James: *on the couch, le gasp*

Regulus: *beside James, leaning towards him and whispering* he watched ahead on a muggle show

James: *whispering* ohhhhhhh

Regulus: *leaning in closer, still whispering, flatly but menacing* if you ever do that, I will kill you.

James: 😃 understood.

[padyandmoonfoot]

regulus never gets hungover. james, with an insane headache, flips him off before smacking his ass

[little-mary-marauders]

Pirate James: We get on the ship and steal everything we can! Pirate James: *sees prince Regulus* Well hello there pretty thing. *Prince Regulus has become everything* Prince Regulus: WHAT-

[moonycriesdies]

James : What is your biggest weakness?

Regulus: I can be uncooperative.

James: Okay, can you give me an example?

Regulus: No.

[honeylemonntea]

Remus: “They’re just so frustrating.”

Remus: “Regulus has been dropping obvious hints that he likes James and he still doesn’t get it!”

Sirius: *wearing a ‘PLEASE SNOG ME, MOONY’ hat* “Wow that’s crazy”

[redadidassneakers]

Regulus: my parents have chosen the woman I am to be in an arranged marriage with

James: I’m pregnant!

Regulus: what!?

James: and it’s yours

[wolvesandshine]

I know everyone portrays Regulus as the one with exquisite and expensive taste but listen James was the only child of one of Englands richest and oldest wizarding family. He casually wears a rolex watch without thinking twice and is the type to drop hundreds of dollars on a gift. And the thing he goes about it completely unaware of how absurdly expensive all his things are

[propussyslayer]

sirius: so what do you do for a living

remus: i hunt and kill zombies

sirius: the fuck no you don't

remus: have you ever seen one?

sirius: no?

remus: then you are fucking welcome

[dreamer0903]

*Jegulus texting*

James: Reggieee

James: Reggie, what are you doing?? :)

James: Reggie why aren't you answering??

Regulus: Can't find my phone, maybe I'll text you when I find it.

James: Oh,ok , don't worry love

*3 hours later*

James: did you find it yet?

Regulus: no.

James: Dammit :(

[accio-sriracha]

Me a year ago: Wtf why would anybody write James with someone other than Lily??? They're literally perfect???

Me now: *gay gremlin noises* JEGULUS. STARCHASER. SUNSEEKER. THE BABIES. SO PERFECT. IN LOVE. MUST WRITE NOW.

[my-castles-crumbling]

Sirius, introducing Regulus to his friends after they reconcile: …and this is my friend Remus!

Regulus, rolling his eyes: Sirius, I’ve seen you two in the hall. I told you I’m gay. You don’t have to lie to me.

Sirius, confused: What?

Remus, nervous: What?

Regulus, turning to James: Are they seriously that oblivious?

James, distracted by Regulus’s eyes: What?